12.11.2008

Gray Day

Baby L has been sick this week. Last night, he woke up with a fever of 103. We gave him tylenol and a lukewarm bath, then bundled him off to bed once his temperature was close to normal. This morning, his fever is lower but he crawls around despondently, collapsing onto anything soft for an impromptu nap, or sits in the middle of the floor with his arms raised, crying for me to hold him.

I feel like doing the same. 

I'm sad. Since I'm used to fighting depression, part of me wants to get rid of this feeling by any means possible, afraid that it will snowball and rob me of all will to function. But I'm not depressed, I'm just sad, and for good reason. I think I need time to mull over events, process my emotions, and let it run it's course. It's simply providential that baby L requires a quiet day as well, allowing me to hunker down in a warm quilt and watch daily routines crumble to pieces around me.

We're taking a sick day, he and I. 

4 comments:

Annje said...

hope you both feel better soon. love your blog!

Rebecca Frame (soon to be a Clark) with my soon-to-be hubby and 3 kiddos who never let there be a dull moment in our home. said...

I love reading your blog...I think you choose the perfect words to describe what you are feeling...hope you are back to better soon.

Alamodey said...

Though this may not be a 'depressed' time for you, I want to thank you about being so open about your depression. It's one of the things that really drew me into your blog (that and how often I kept saying "Dang! She's so cool!"), and your honesty with it is so comforting to me as someone who's struggled/struggling with the same. Anyway, that my overly-wordy way of saying thanks and I hope tomorrow is better.

tharker said...

I hope that yesterday was a better day than Thursday.

I too love your openness and honesty about your battle with depression. Thank you!

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